Kevin Kolb: Frustrated

Kevin Kolb: Frustrated by Shakεy

May 21, 2009, 1:28 pm
Filed under: Shakey | Tags: butt tampons, Donovan McNabb contract extension, Kevin Kolb, Kevin Kolb frustrated, Mewtwo, Prom, robot spider monsters, vampire zombie hybrid

Today Eagles backup Quarterback Kevin Kolb said he’d be ‘frustrated’ if Donovan McNabb received a contract extension. Unfortunately for Kolb, journalists didn’t give enough of a shit about him to print the rest of his words. But you know what Kevin? I’m here for you. I’ll tell the world how you really feel.

Kevin Kolb would also be frustrated if…

• His Mom doesn’t make him cheese lasagna tonight like she promised
• Carmen Electra’s boobs are fake
• Hulk Hogan doesn’t sign his Hulkamania underwear
• he were kneed in the groin by Bob Saget
• DeSean Jackson forgets to return his slinky
• His name change request for ‘DeWalt Diggums’ is declined
• James Worthy doesn’t lend him a pair of goggles
• He can’t catch a Mewtwo in Pokemon Silver
• Game Informer gives BioShock 2 a bad review
• His pop tarts are stale
• Al Davis isn’t really a vampire-zombie hybrid
• Business_Socks won’t go to prom with him
• He can’t figure out how to sign up for Twitter
• He wasn’t supposed to use tampons to combat diarrhea
• Brian Westbrook won’t invite him to watch Terminator Salvation with the cool kids
• He shouldn’t have neutered himself like Bob Barker said
• We aren’t riding robot spider monsters by 2015
• Grey’s Anatomy is cancelled

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